Title Goes Here

I've started about three different posts, and none of them are working for me.

In summary:

1. The ever-widening-ass disease I developed after quitting smoking is still attempting to hold me in its greedy little grasp. In retaliation, I have negotiated a tenuous truce with my treadmill, as simply counting calories is turning me into a madwoman.

2. There is a plot afoot by food manufacturers to cause me to continue to suffer from the above-mentioned syndrome. This is evidenced by a) the disappearance of Merita light wheat hamburger buns from the grocery store shelves; and b) the disappearance of Libby's Pure Pumpkin from those same shelves.

3. I'm not as stressed as recent posts (including this one) would make me seem.

4. Shutting up now, lest this become Discarded Post No. 4.