Monday, October 16, 2006

Nerd/Geek/Dork Test

I wasn't surprised at scoring higest as nerd...

For The Record:

A Nerd is someone who is passionate about learning/being smart/academia.
A Geek is someone who is passionate about some particular area or subject, often an obscure or difficult one.
A Dork is someone who has difficulty with common social expectations/interactions.
You scored better than half in all three, earning you the title of: Outcast Genius.

Outcast geniuses usually are bright enough to understand what society wants of them, and they just don't care! They are highly intelligent and passionate about the things they know are *truly* important in the world. Typically, this does not include sports, cars or make-up, but it can on occassion (and if it does then they know more than all of their friends combined in that subject).

Outcast geniuses can be very lonely, due to their being outcast from most normal groups and too smart for the room among many other types of dorks and geeks, but they can also be the types to eventually rule the world, ala Bill Gates, the prototypical Outcast Genius.


Also, you might want to check out some of my other tests if you're interested in any of the following:

Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Professional Wrestling

Love & Sexuality

Sunday, October 15, 2006

Mom vs. Mom

I've been revisiting some old message boards I used to post on, regarding childbirth and how we feed our children. Why-oh-WHY are we mothers so hard on each other?

It seems like in childbirth, we're screwed no matter how we went through it. If we had a textbook vaginal hospital birth, with or without epidural, we've screwed up because a) we gave into the "fear factor" and had our kids in the hospital, and/or b) because we weren't "strong" enough to handle birth without an epidural.

It could never be the case that we felt fine birthing in a hospital and really, legitimately WERE pleased with our birth outcomes.

If we ended up with a c-section as the result of a hospital birth, a) it was our own damed fault for being in the hospital in the first place; b) if we HADN'T had that epidural or the c-section wouldn't have happened; c) our doctors had a personal time-crunch and
"decided" we were Failing To Progress, and thus had us sectioned so they wouldn't miss a golf game/ dinner with their wife/ a night out with the guys.

It could never be the case that a c-section was warranted, and nothing we did or could have done would have had any impact. Perish the thought.

If we had a homebirth? Oh don't get me started. First off, if we had to transfer to a hospital, that's what we "get" for trying to have a baby at home. Or if our midwives were less than we wished? We didn't look hard enough for a compatible midwife (nevermind that we might be, er, LIMITED in our choices).

And even if things went well in a homebirth? "Well, I just can't believe you took that risk!" "What are you, some kind of hippie?"


And it continues after the child is born, by whatever means.

"What, you're bottle feeding? Don't you KNOW that the immunities you pass on to your baby as well as the oral-muscular development are paramount?"

"What, you're breast feeding? Don't you know that fathers need to bond with their children too? What, are you some kind of martyr?

The list of garbage goes on and on.

The big thing is this. Childbirth is a small part of a child's entire life. Sure, there can be effects from the birth process, but barring major complications we usually don't dwell on those effects to the detriment of our children. What truly matters is how we RAISE our children, not how we BIRTH them

And as for feeding kids? Again, a small portion of the child's life. Granted, breastmilk is best and breastfeeding is optimal for jaw development, gastric development, and immunological issues. But does bottle feeding cause irrrepairable damage? In most children, no. Sure it does, in some cases, but in the vast majority it doesn't.

What we mothers really need to do is to support each other in the process of raising our children, in teaching them how to become responsible and productive members of our society. We don't need to be bashing each other for epidurals, homebirths, bottle feeding, breast feeding, or any other of a myriad of choices we as parents make in what we feel are the best interests of our children and families at the time we make them.

And for the record? I had one appalling hospital birth. Some great nurses are at my local hospital. Unfortunately, I didn't have any of them for my elder son's birth. This doesn't mean all L&D nurses are evil, it just means I got a crummy shift. I can accept that. Some of my post-partum nurses were great. But the entire experience soured me on hospital birth outside of medical necessity. My nurses for my L&D were not the best, and it did have an effect on how I felt about hospital birth in general, and most importantly it taught me how important it was to have birth attendants who had full-pregnancy experience with my dry-humored self present at the birth. Because that way? No one would look at me sideways when I told everyone to to STFU.

For my second son, I had a home birth. It was GREAT. It wasn't perfect because, frankly, nothing short of pain-free childbirth would have been perfect in my book (I am a TOTAL wimp, admittedly). But it went well. During that birth I learned that a) I can handle labor pains like a champ (but that applying liquid eyeliner mid-contraction is a major no-no), and b) I hate pushing, because it freaking HURTS. Other women have different experiences, and that's cool, but I hate, hate, HATE pushing. I'd rather stay in transition forever than push. And that's just me.

The huge plusses about homebirth for me were that a) I was in MY house, and I like my home; b) I knew everyone there, and knew that they'd all been with me for months, and knew my sense of humor and wouldn't be freaked out by my "dryness".; c) I was really very cool with all these folks in my house, and even moreso since I'd bought a platter of holiday cookies from our local snooty bakery, partly because I liked the WONDERFUL eggnog cookies, and partly because I just knew everyone would love all the rest of the cookies, period, and d) have I mentioned being in my OWN home again? Because after what I dealt with in the hospital after having my first, that part was HUGE.

And no, it wasn't all roses. My younger son wasn't as sleepy as my elder, he was cranky from the get-go, he wanted what HE wanted, and NOW... but I was home, and it was fine.

I realize it isn't that way for everyone, but it was for me.

That being said, my SIL is expecting her first in just six weeks, and she's doing the hospital thing and planning to bottle feed (I didn't mention it, but I breastfed the first for 13 months and the second for 19 months). And yanno what? I'm fine with her decisions. I hope her birth goes well, I hope that she's happy with it. And with her feeding of her child? Same thing.

Heck, just being Auntie Amanda rather than MOMMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! is good enough for me ;)